Relationships require work, and it’s normal for there to be low points where you both don’t see eye to eye. But if you’ve been unhappy for a while, you might be considering divorce.
However, how do you know for sure that it’s time to end your marriage? While this can be more of a straightforward decision in situations where there’s been abuse or infidelity, it might not be so clear-cut if it’s largely down to you both not being where you were before.
If you’re navigating complicated feelings towards your partner, there are some common signs to be aware of that can signal it’s time to part ways.
Persistent lack of communication
An ongoing breakdown in communication can be a strong sign that your marriage isn’t where it should be. This can look like a few things. It might be that you don’t talk openly about your feelings or avoid talking about important things that affect your life as a couple. It may be that the only form of communication you have is in the form of arguments and disagreements or you both refuse to back down. Or it could be that you just don’t talk at all.
Having strong communication is a huge part of any relationship. If things aren’t where they should be and you’re not talking like you’re in a partnership anymore, this can be a sign that you’re growing apart.
Emotional or physical distance
Communication issues can also be part of a wider issue around the emotional and physical distance between the two of you. If you’re both living separately and not sharing your experiences, it can be easy to lose track of where you are in your relationship. And if this is compounded by a lack of physical intimacy, it can suddenly feel like you’re living with a roommate rather than your romantic partner.
Reaching the point where you’re distant with one another can be a signal that your relationship is beyond repair.
Frequent arguments or resentment
We’ve already touched on arguments signifying poor communication, but they can also cause resentment. If these feelings of resentment have built up, it can flag that you’re no longer compatible and that there are deeper issues that can’t be resolved.
The type of arguments you have can also be an indication that you might be happier if you divorce. If you don’t have the same political views, for instance, this can be a huge reason to part ways, especially if you have children and you want to raise them with a certain set of values.
Considering life apart
If one or both of you are thinking about what life would be like if you were no longer married, and this is becoming an increasingly common occurrence, this could signify that you’re ready to move on.
When to seek advice
There’s the chance that couples therapy could help resolve some issues you might be having, especially if there are other factors that could be influencing what’s happening. For instance, it may be that your partner is dealing with other issues that are leading to them clamming up and refusing to communicate. It could be that they’re experiencing stress, anxiety or depression, where counselling could be beneficial for them and your relationship.
However, if you think that you’ve reached a point where divorce is the only solution, speaking with family lawyers can help you understand the divorce process, the potential outcomes, and other things like timescales. Lawyers are skilled in providing this advice and are on hand to help.
Take the time to decide. This is an important juncture in your life so it’s vital that you think carefully before you take the next step.
